18 to 24 months · Car seat refusal
Car seat refusal at 18 to 24 months
Quick answer
What should I say when car seat refusal at 18 to 24 months?
You want to climb in yourself. I know buckles feel tight.
What's happening developmentally
Being buckled removes the ability to move, right when the drive to move independently is exploding, so the arched back and stiff legs are a control fight more than a seat complaint.
Three scripts to try
“You want to climb in yourself. I know buckles feel tight.”
“Do you want to climb in on your own two feet, or should I lift you like an airplane?”
“Let's click the buckle like a race car driver, three, two, one, click!”
These are a starting point, not a transcript. Read when to reach for each type.
What not to say, and why
- “Threatening to leave without them.” — An empty threat at this age, and it teaches that big feelings get met with bigger scare tactics instead of help.
- “Wrestling the buckle while they're mid-scream.” — Can turn a routine buckle into a dreaded event that gets fought every single time.
When it usually passes
Letting them do the last click themselves, even if you did the hard part, usually cuts this fight down fast because it hands back a sliver of control.